Love Languages: What's Yours?

This is so important, I'm surprised I've not talked about it sooner. Well, better late than never!

What are Love Languages?

I'm sure most of you have heard of love languages, which refer to the various ways people naturally express and receive love. Dr. Gary Chapman identified five main types: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Understanding your own love language and your partner's (or child's/family member's/friend's) helps you communicate affection more effectively, because what makes one person feel loved might be different from what makes another person feel loved. I'll explain why this is important after I describe each one.

1. Words of Affirmation

• Expressing love through verbal compliments and appreciation
• Includes encouraging words, "I love you," and "I appreciate you"
• Written notes, texts, and spoken praise all matter deeply
• Criticism or harsh words can be particularly hurtful to these individuals

2. Quality Time

• Giving someone your full, undivided attention
• Being present without distractions like phones or TV
• Engaging in meaningful conversations and activities together
• It's not just about being in the same room, but truly connecting

3. Receiving Gifts

• Valuing thoughtful, tangible symbols of love
• The meaning and effort behind the gift matters more than cost
• Remembering special occasions is important
• Even small tokens show "you were thinking of me"

4. Acts of Service

• Showing love through helpful actions and gestures
• Doing tasks you know would ease their burden
• Could include cooking, running errands, or handling chores
• "Actions speak louder than words" is important

5. Physical Touch

• Expressing love through physical connection and closeness
• Includes hugs, hand-holding, kisses, and cuddling
• Physical presence and touch provide comfort and security
• Absence of touch or physical distance can feel like rejection

Why are Love Languages Important?

The best way to explain why love languages are important is to give you a real example—mine. My love language is Words of Affirmation, while my husband's is Physical Touch. Here's the challenge: I've never been comfortable with being touched. Whether it's because I'm an empath and find physical contact overwhelming, or for some other reason, it's just not how I naturally connect. You can probably see the potential problem here. My husband's primary way of showing love is the very thing that doesn't resonate with me.

He expresses his love through hugs, cuddling, and being close to me. If I'm not receptive to that, it can make him feel rejected, even though that's not my intention at all. Meanwhile, I feel most loved when he verbally expresses his feelings and appreciation. So if he's not saying the words, I might feel unloved, even when he's actively showing love in his own way.

This is exactly why understanding love languages matters. We were both giving love, but we weren't speaking each other's language. Once we recognized this pattern, we both made conscious efforts to show our love how the other person needs to receive it.  

Side Note: 

Also, words affect me deeply. If someone says something mean or rude, it's like a slap in my face. Likewise, a simple short text can make my day.  So if your loved one's love language is Words of Affirmation, be mindful of what you say because they're more than just words to them.

Forced Course Corrections

I started to announce what I'm currently working on in a short Facebook post. However, as I wrote, it quickly expanded into more, so here we are.

Book News

Firstly, what I initially was going to talk about on my author page was how I'm revisiting my first ever (and still my favorite) published series, For Always. Out of nowhere, while working on my current book, Fully Awake, which is about halfway finished, I got a sudden urge to publish the For Always series as a box set. Thinking this could be done rather quickly, and should've been done a long time ago, I soon realized I was very mistaken. 

When I went to open the files, which are from several years ago, I was surprised to see that they were all corrupt, and I wasn't able to open them. Because of this, I had to jump through hoops to download and convert PDFs, which messed up the formatting and left me having to fix it for each book, which is a feat in itself. As I started doing this yesterday, I thought, "Why not just revise them, too?" Since this was my first ever and most-loved book series, and I've learned a lot since then, why not breathe some new life into it? 

So, not only am I putting this series into a box set that will be FREE on Kindle Unlimited, but I'm revising them, too! I'm sure most of the storyline will remain the same because I don't have time (and don't want) to change it. Even so, it just might make former readers fall in love with Beau all over again... and find new readers to introduce him to.

Sidetracked or Forced Course Correction?

Getting 'sidetracked' like this has happened to me a lot recently. And while I was listening to a podcast the other day, I heard someone use the term forced course correction. As he described it, I was like... yes, that's happened to me! 

What it is, at least for me, is when an unexpected major life change redirects us toward our true path or purpose. What feels like a disruption is actually steering us away from a path that wasn't serving our highest good. I know something as simple as getting the urge to revise a book series and putting it into a box set isn't a major life change, but what if it leads to one?

Several months ago, I had a big forced course correction (FCC) when I injured my back. The odd part is that I didn't fall or have an accident; I was simply bending over, tending to my rocks (yes, I'm one of those people), and a terrible pain shot through my back. By the next morning, I was in the ER, unable to move. Thankfully, it's slowly getting better, but it caused me to take a step back from my life, literally, and refocus my attention on my life's purpose. 

Have You Had an FCC?

Sometimes, we get little signs. Feelings that tug at us. A deep knowing that we push to the side. We give ourselves excuses as to why we need to keep things the same. The main reason for this is that our ego, our mind, wants to keep us safe. And change isn't safe, it's unknown. So, we ignore the signs. And that's when life sends us an FCC that we can't ignore.

So, on a small scale, stepping away from a book I'd planned on finishing this year and diving into something new, yet old, is risky regarding my publishing life. On a larger scale, having chronic spinal issues and stepping away from a job and people I care about to pursue something completely new and what some consider 'woo-woo' is crazy. Even so, I feel that both are the paths I need to take. With the books, I'm listening to the sign and tug before an FCC happens, like it did with my back. 

Is there something that has already happened or feels like it is in the process of sidetracking you? Throwing you off course? A sign... or maybe two? If so, take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Is it simply a distraction? Or is it a correction that you're supposed to make happen? A new path you're supposed to take? 

Don't let the universe take you out just to get you going in the right direction.